10-29-2019, 10:56 PM
My friend, let me first say what an amazing post. You are spot on about depression as a whole, and I too am thankful you got your help.
I'd like to chime in my two cents because I'm half depressed. I say that because, as I've posted before, I'm bipolar, and have both a manic and depressive side. It's something that, in retrospect, makes a lot of sense of how I would reach to situations, including this game. I think a lot of people mistake depression and mania as things easy to control, when in fact, a lot of the time it's something we don't realize we are in the middle of.
Now, I also have PTSD, which is one of those diseases that can really exacerbate both mania and depression. I faced this head on back in July. I talked to a few about it, but over the weekend of July 14th, I went into a panic attack that was the worst I had ever experienced. It lasted from Saturday late night/Sunday early morning until Monday. One of my best friends is an RN and Monday came to my house and found me curled up in my bed, shaking. After about an hour she simply said "you're going to the hospital, now." Long story short, I had myself checked into the hospital voluntarily, but they did discharge me believing I was not a harm to myself.
I contacted my therapist who had an emergency session with me, and it was determined that I had a full-on depressive PTSD flashback. Why? July 17th was the 21st anniversary of my brother's passing, and for 20 years, I had blocked the date out. Effectively, my defenses and my desire to face the cause of my PTSD went head to head and I had feelings I didn't know how to cope with. I was depressed. I was upset. I was scared. I didn't know what feelings to have pro or con.
I share this because depression is something that can manifest in many ways. And people need to realize you can have friends who put on a front, but if you're willing to get to know them, befriend them, and show them you truly care, you could be that person who looks them in the eye and tells them they need help, and they listen. You could become that friendly face and one logical voice that keeps them from doing something drastic or finally figuring out what is causing their problems.
You all, this game, this fed, especially since I returned, has become one of the greatest enjoyments I have had. Yeah I missed a deadline, and took a nap, but unlike in the past where I'm so concerned about getting a push, I can simply say, "I'll get them next time." And a lot of that attitude is because of each and every handler here.
I may sound like a carbon copy of the above, but take it from another who suffers everyday, but entrusts others to help him fight and know that, in the end, it's worth it.
Like above, I love you all. Thank you for being there for people like us, and not laughing or writing us off, but being supportive of us, regardless of IC or OOC past or present.
I'd like to chime in my two cents because I'm half depressed. I say that because, as I've posted before, I'm bipolar, and have both a manic and depressive side. It's something that, in retrospect, makes a lot of sense of how I would reach to situations, including this game. I think a lot of people mistake depression and mania as things easy to control, when in fact, a lot of the time it's something we don't realize we are in the middle of.
Now, I also have PTSD, which is one of those diseases that can really exacerbate both mania and depression. I faced this head on back in July. I talked to a few about it, but over the weekend of July 14th, I went into a panic attack that was the worst I had ever experienced. It lasted from Saturday late night/Sunday early morning until Monday. One of my best friends is an RN and Monday came to my house and found me curled up in my bed, shaking. After about an hour she simply said "you're going to the hospital, now." Long story short, I had myself checked into the hospital voluntarily, but they did discharge me believing I was not a harm to myself.
I contacted my therapist who had an emergency session with me, and it was determined that I had a full-on depressive PTSD flashback. Why? July 17th was the 21st anniversary of my brother's passing, and for 20 years, I had blocked the date out. Effectively, my defenses and my desire to face the cause of my PTSD went head to head and I had feelings I didn't know how to cope with. I was depressed. I was upset. I was scared. I didn't know what feelings to have pro or con.
I share this because depression is something that can manifest in many ways. And people need to realize you can have friends who put on a front, but if you're willing to get to know them, befriend them, and show them you truly care, you could be that person who looks them in the eye and tells them they need help, and they listen. You could become that friendly face and one logical voice that keeps them from doing something drastic or finally figuring out what is causing their problems.
You all, this game, this fed, especially since I returned, has become one of the greatest enjoyments I have had. Yeah I missed a deadline, and took a nap, but unlike in the past where I'm so concerned about getting a push, I can simply say, "I'll get them next time." And a lot of that attitude is because of each and every handler here.
I may sound like a carbon copy of the above, but take it from another who suffers everyday, but entrusts others to help him fight and know that, in the end, it's worth it.
Like above, I love you all. Thank you for being there for people like us, and not laughing or writing us off, but being supportive of us, regardless of IC or OOC past or present.