11-20-2019, 12:44 PM
[img] https://i.imgur.com/Mi5XTyv.png[/img]
Para el cafe.
For the Coffee.
(The animated doodle of El Lucho Grande hopping around the screen in various poses disappears when a cartoon van drives towards the screen. Its engine hums loudly before the angle changes and loud bang erupts as the exhaust explodes with a plume of smoke which engulfs the screen, it sounds like a gunshot to the point that the sound of neighbourhood dogs begin to bark loudly, cat’s screeching like Bree Lancaster and some alarms seem to go off all at once at the ass crack of dawn… The blackness of what was our smoke screen begins to dissipate to reveal we’re now IRL and a banged-up van which has seen better days draws to a screeching halt and a splutter…)
Nate Patrick: “God damn it, Gina stop with the noise already, I already had you serviced!!”
(The picture changes to inside the van which to the untrained eye could be considered the strangest of images if it were to be an artwork… The two masked men known as El Lucho Grande & El Lucho Venti sat behind a much smaller and uglier Nate Patrick who hits the steering wheel with his forehead causing the horn to sound briefly… Both Mexicans look to the other with Grande speaking up in a thick French accent…)
El Lucho Grande: “Monsieur, what is a Gina? Is this the Gina G which is so popular in Le Mexico?!”
Nate Patrick: “Who? Oh… Uh no, this Gina was my third Ex-Wife, god knows she was a loud one so she could have rivalled whoever you’re talking about...”
El Lucho Venti: “Loud… Is this because she liked the Nates penis or was jealous of his fabulouslo hair?”
(Venti leans forward now and begins to stroke the flowing mane that is the mullet of Nate Patrick, he moves his head away swatting Venti’s hand like it were a fly, the Luchador falling back into his chair sad…)
Nate Patrick: “Would you stop that, I’m not a pussy… That guy was an asshole trying to start a fight in the last town when he said that, which by the way I’d appreciate you not laughing next time!!!”
El Lucho Grande: “See hombre, I told you!!”
(Grande open hand chops Venti across the chest while the camera focuses in on Nate who sighs, now thinking back to the times he had with his ex-wife Gina and ponders the life they could have had before he decided that managing pro wrestlers was the way to go… She didn’t agree and left with the mailman who apparently had a real job, that jerk… Anyway! The veteran manager of the greatest team to come out of Mexico since Taco & Bell turns around to find both of his talents have already exited the van. Outside in the Motel parking lot El Lucho Venti is performing lunges to stretch his legs after the long ride from the airport and El Lucho Grande is performing forward rolls only to stop when Venti notices him heading towards incoming traffic so rushes over to prevent an accident…)
Nate Patrick: “Guys… Stay away from traffic yeah, I’d hate to explain that to SCW!”
(Venti having pulled Grande up to his feet now who appeared a little dizzy wave’s off Nate who leans back into the driver’s seat. He looks back at the number of bags at the back and shrugs his shoulders…)
Nate Patrick: “Why were they playing in traffic? Oh you know… reasons… that’d go down well… Ugh… Guess I’ll get the bags then… but first should probably get the rooms sorted.”
(Nate exits the van and heads towards the motel office to collect the keys and pay for the rooms, once he enters through the door, the bell sounds and with that there is a switch which seems to flick on inside him and the Nate which is seen on TV appears in the flesh… He takes a pause though due to the unsavoury “aroma” of the office itself but digs deep as he flashes his pearly whites, and entertains the most confident of swagger without wanting to vomit…
Sat behind the counter is a rather large woman, large enough to consider her body mass was equal to the butt cheeks of Kandis. She is sat watching TV while eating some Chinese takeout completely ignoring Nates presence as he struts to the counter and hits the bell….)
Nate Patrick: “scuse’ me darlin’ can I have a quick minute of your time?”
(The woman behind the counter removes a dumpling from the box and shoves it in her mouth as she turns to look at Nate, the moment she sees him her eyes light up and she looks to have swallowed said dumpling whole with an inhale, frightening… Grabbing a napkin she wipes her fingers and face clean and licks her lips before adjusting her bra accordingly which sends a shiver down the spine of Nate’s….
Her attention now fully on the snazzy dressed manager of Venti and Grande…)
Motel Clerk: “Well hello there to you too darling, I didn’t hear you come in… how can I help?”
Nate Patrick: “… Ya’ll didn’t hear the explosion that came from my van moments ago?”
Motel Clerk: “Oh that were you, I thought those gang bangers were up to their usual tricks!”
(Nate took a pause for a moment to let that sink in, but then shrugged it off because he had two pro wrestlers outside who were experienced in fighting crime in the land of Mexico in their spare time when they weren’t wrestling. Plus, this wasn’t the Bellagio after all, it was some dump of a motel which was cheap to him the price was very right…)
Nate Patrick: “Oh those gang bangers are always up to no good, so I see ya’ll are busy and I’m truly sorry for disturbing your evening meal darling, which looks delightful by the way I do love me some old Chinese takeout.”
Motel Clerk: “Who doesn’t honey?”
Nate Patrick: “Agreed! But to be honest, while I can speak of the finer tastes of Chinese food all night with ya, it has been a loooong few days for yours truly. Flew in on a red eye flight from London and to be honest I’m beat… So are my clients and with that said, while you and I we could talk later if you please. Right now, I would very much like to get the keys to our rooms, the name is Nate Patrick part of three.”
Motel Clerk: “Hmm… Lemme check the book for a moment… Name don’t ring a bell…”
(Nates heart sinks a little with concern that his booking might night have gone through now; the clerk turns on her plump legs and waddles over to another desk where a book resides next to a phone. The get up looks all so very old fashioned you could say, she goes through the pages with a hum of one of the many, many food commercials…
While she’s busy, Nate looks outside to see the two wrestling each other outside. Grande lifting Venti up onto his shoulders and running towards the van before ramming him into it…)
Nate Patrick: “What the…”
Motel Clerk: “Oh there you are, took a moment to find ya! Nate Patrick, Party of three. You like to party huh?”
(The clerk laughed at her own joke which prompts Nate to do the same, he was a salesman, a professional speaker, and was now trying to sell himself to the point this woman gave them a damn room but all she looked like doing was devouring him like one of those dumplings…)
Motel Clerk: “I found ya here Nate, but the problem here is that we’ve only got the one room left. Our prices are cheap as you probably know, so they’re popular. We got ourselves a lot of pro’s out there using them for their work and…”
(The belt once again sounds from the door to the office and when it does, the Clerk drops the book to the countertop and her eyes widen a little like she had just found out her next meal was a salad…)
Nate Patrick: “You okay darlin’? You’re not about to have a stroke on me are ya?!”
Motel Clerk: “… Oh my god please don’t hurt me…”
(Nate looks at her weirdly he is not sure what it is she is talking about at first, this changes when he turns around and notices Grande and Venti now standing behind him striking two different poses… As soon as he realizes he laughs it off and gets his attention back on the clerk who isn’t sure what is going on…)
Nate Patrick: “What?! Oh, sweet cheeks, you got yourself nothin’ to fear, these here are the clients I were speaking about! Fellas introduce yourselves to the fine young lady please before you give her a coronary.”
(Hearing the words fine and young, puts a smile on the lips of the motel clerk once again but those words merely confuse poor Venti and Grande, Nate only hopes they don’t say something he’ll regret later…)
El Lucho Venti: “Hola! It is most honorable to make a visage of one so big! I am El Lucho Venti! This ihere is my partner, El Lucho Grande!”
(Venti slaps Grande in the chest proudly and nods, Grande stands there posing like a would-be superhero still with his hands on his hips… Nate half smiles knowing all to well this could have gone a lot worse…)
Motel Clerk: “Oh… your... Partner? Wow ya’ll tellin me I have a couple of gay Luchadores stayin at my motel?! My oh my!”
(Nate stands there wide eyed as Grande and Venti look at each other confused for a moment, they both nod in unison however…)
El Lucho Grande: “Happy we very are to be in United States, very Gay GAY GAY GAY!!”
Motel Clerk: “Well that’s awesome honey, it is 2019 now after all. You’re free to be whatever you want to be!”
El Lucho Grande: “Yes! This is true! Therefore, you are hippo, yes?!”
El Lucho Venti: “Oooh, Good EYE esse!!”
(The Clerk looks at both men and begins to go red, we’re unsure if its due to rage, her high blood pressure or embarrassment… Nate however leaps into the rescue because sleeping in the van was not an option, especially if there WERE gang bangers outside somewhere lurking… and sure as hell didn’t want to end up with another corpse on his hands…
What?
What…?)
Nate Patrick: “Whoa, whoa, there fellas, be nice to the lady. My apologies Mrs… I assume there is a Mr somewhere around here?”
Motel Clerk: “My name is Samantha… and I’m not a Mrs no one has been able to tie me down…”
(Both Lucha’s look at each other and Grande whispers in the ear of Venti and they both give each other a nod and thumbs up. Samantha the clerk watches em both before Nate interjects to save the moment…)
Nate Patrick: “REALLY?! Well then, Miss Samantha… Please accept my most humble apology on the behest of my clients here... They aren’t from round these parts as you can see and well…”
Motel Clerk: “He compared me to a hippo…?”
Nate Patrick: “Well, ya ever been to Mexico darling?”
Motel Clerk: “Well no, I’ve never led an extravagant life… Besides I thought we were building a damn wall to keep folks like that outta here? Especially if they are gonna insult me…”
Nate Patrick: “Well… where he’s from it considered a term of endearment, to him it means you have a lot more to love ya know? He meant nothing by it, I swear! Besides what does he know he’s gay.”
(This brought a chuckle from Samantha the Motel Clerk, her attention and the redness in her face beginning to fade out, well not that much… Grande and Venti both looked at each other and Nate could feel them wanting to say something so spun around and gave them both a look which they got immediately…)
Nate Patrick: “Fellas, why don’t you go out to the van and start grabbing our stuff…?”
El Lucho Grande: “Hai!”
El Lucho Venti: “Si amigo! Good luck sticking your penis inside it.”
(Both men turn and exit the office leaving Nate wide eyed in shock at what they just said… It was a moment he wished they spoke in one of the many foreign languages… a moment Grande would have not Venti… He turns around to see Samantha eyeing him like he were a pork chop and she was a lioness, albeit a rather fat lioness at that getting ideas…)
Motel Clerk: “Did your gay little friend say you wanted to stick your penis inside me honey?”
Nate Patrick: “… He did…”
Motel Clerk: “Well if you play ya cards right, maybe that can happen. But you’d have to buy me dinner first and I’ve just eaten so…”
(Nate being the ever-opportunistic businessman see his opening…)
Nate Patrick: “So another time then? We travel a lot darling, always trying to find cheap accommodation for the night. Depending on how great the room is, we could easily make this our main spot while traveling the east coast.”
Motel Clerk: “Oh really? Well I’m sure we could come to some sort of arrangement darling…”
(Samantha the clerk winking at Nate who gulped nothing but air but smiled all the same, he really did not wish to sleep in the van with Venti and Grande, they both like to spoon. She whips out her book again and motions for Nate to come closer, she wishes to smell him but also get his signature and contact details for future bookings… Nate obliges of course, he had to and after another thirty minutes or so Nate has left the office feeling a lot dirtier than before he arrived if that were even possible…
Stepping outside and allowing the cold Chicago air to cool him down and hoping wash off the scent he had accumulated while in there, Grande and Venti are now sat on top of the van waiting for him…)
Nate Patrick: “Guys! What are you doing up there, where are the bags?!”
El Lucho Venti: “Tell us did you get date?”
Nate Patrick: “I’ll tell you later, where are the…”
(Nate approaches the van to see the bags haven’t been removed, but he looks down to see the wheels have… The van now sitting on a set of bricks…)
Nate Patrick: “Oh no no no no… What the hell?! When did this happen?!”
El Lucho Grande: “It is okay! They will bring them back! They promised amigo!”
Nate Patrick: “What?!”
El Lucho Venti: “The tire restorers of course! They noticed how worn they were and offered to fix them for free!”
Nate Patrick: “… This is a joke, right? You know what… Lets talk about it upstairs in the room, I can’t stand here all night and let people watch.”
El Lucho Grande: “No one wants to see you cry amigo, especially Venti and Grande.”
(Nate sighs, he nods and approaches the van and is hell bent on getting inside this room of theres they have. A good sleep will do wonders and then the three can begin the photo signings arranged by SCW to promote Breakdown given El lucho Grande has a huge TV Title opportunity…
He pulls out the bags and throws one over his shoulder while holding the other two, he is struggling but isn’t going to be defeated, this is the sort of thing he signed up for and wasn’t going to let it beat him, he was married three times before so this was going to be a breeze!
All three men went up to the room as our camera shot changes to within it, the fumbling of the key is what give it away and with that the door opens with a click and swings open with Nate Patrick falling through it thanks to El Lucho Grande pushing him through the door with both Luchadores leaping over him into the room. El Lucho Grande walks over to the bathroom and switches on the light in there, El Lucho Venti turns on the light by the door, both Luchaodres look at each other and then down at Nate Patrick and reach down to him. He extends his hands and both men pick up their bags and walk over to the bed…)
Nate Patrick: “Guys, what the hell you can at least help me up!?!”
El Lucho Grande: “Apologize Mi Amigo!”
(El Lucho Venti looks over to Grande and nods with his head motioning to Nate, the larger Luchadore approaching and helping him up to his feet finally before dusting him down which happened to be a lot of dust on the floor… Nate looks around the room after shutting the door and winces a little at the state it is in…)
Nate Patrick: “Thanks buddy, god this room is a shit hole… You really do get what you pay for don’t you… I’m sorry guys…”
El Lucho Venti: “We have worse beds before, right Grande?”
El Lucho Grande: “Si!”
(Grande offers a thumbs up to Nate before giving him a hug and a pat on the back and then the head… Truth was Nate needed that kind of interaction from Grande because he always came across as an asshole… But then he’d have moments like this which made all his other moments worth it. Their star was shining in Supreme Championship Wrestling after all and could shine even brighter soon… With the GOLD variety which meant better money, and better lodgings!!
An hour passes by and both Venti and Grande are sat at the end of the bed watching TV, Nate has left the bathroom with a robe around his waist which he owned, not the hotel… He shudders as he does however…)
Nate Patrick: “I’m telling you fellas, I’m afraid what we might find if we shone a black light in that bathroom or here for that matter… I’d have a feeling it’d be the same as the inside of Kandis underwear if you know what I mean?”
(There is no reaction from both Venti and Grande although Nate laughed at his own joke at the expense of one of the people wanting to attack his team of wrestling legends. He walks further in and stands in front of the TV both attention of the men sat at the edge of the bed who throw their arms up in the air!)
El Lucho Grande: “AMIGO! MOVE!!”
Nate Patrick: “Well don’t ignore me then fellas. What are you doing anyway?! What are you watching?”
El Lucho Venti: “Grande is preparing his brain for TV Title Match! He will learn all of Television tonight and be prepared most greatly for all general knowledge questions thrown at him!!”
Nate Patrick: “What…? No guys that isn’t how this works… C’mon now.”
El Lucho Grande: “We not on gameshow like Jeapordy?!”
Nate Patrick: “… No? You’re wrestling! For the TV Championship, a title belt you know what they are!!!”
El Lucho Grande: “… Santa mierda!!! When did this happen?!”
El Lucho Venti: “We did not expect this so soon, we did not know this could happen we are tag team!”
Nate Patrick: “And this is a singles match, a huge match for you Grande… One worthy of your name!”
(Grande sits there looking concerned, he holds his head in his hands while Nate focuses on Venti now….)
El Lucho Venti: “We wanted to offer spot in Lucho Bros as honorary sister to Regan Helms! She would be great addition unlike Trenta who a very weak coffee is.”
(Nate ponders the thought for a moment, but immediately throws it to the side. Regan Helms would never dream of teaming with these two as a trio, besides who would want to put a mask on that beautiful face of hers? That was the money right there as twitter showcased often. But not wanting to deter his clients Nate holds up a finger first… plus he didn’t want to make too many enemies for them here in SCW…)
Nate Patrick: “You know what, lets put a pin in that idea for now and stick it on the wall of ideas for the future. Right now, we need to focus on the present and Grande… Where did Grande go?!”
(Venti looks to his side and throws his arms up in shock, he was there one moment and gone then next. Nate blinked only a moment as well, but he was there one moment, gone the next like a true ninja of the night... Evidently one of the many skills of El Lucho Grande which put the fear of god into criminals in his native Mexico…
Nate turns around and screams like a teenage girl before jumping back to find Grande standing behind him… This gets an applause from Venti who laughs obviously in on the joke...)
El Lucho Venti: “You sound like El Chupacabra!”
El Lucho Grande: “Ha!!! Our amigo did!”
Nate Patrick: “Guys, you need to focus you know that right? We must prepare for what is going to no doubt happen on Breakdown… You’ve made a few enemies already and...”
El Lucho Grande: “Café haters!”
Nate Patrick: “Yes, they hate coffee… and you guys and you know why?”
El Lucho Venti: “Because we are beautiful?”
(Grande turns to Venti and nods offering another, thumbs up. Nate sighs… This was going to be a long night he believed…)
Nate Patrick: “This could be huge guys, I know it might be hard and unexpected, but really this could push your brand high. You could focus on your brand of coffee, you could…”
El Lucho Grande: “CAFFE CELEBRATIONS!!”
(Venti stepped away from the bed and approaches Nate slapping him on the shoulder, the towel almost dropping from his waist, but he manages to hold onto it. Venti nods to Grande he walks over to his bag and removes three mugs and places them on the sideboard of the room. With his back to the other two he reaches down and unzips…)
Nate Patrick: “So I really think you have a shot at this TV Title Grande… Hey… Uh what’s he doing…?”
(It sounds like he is humming to himself while doing something downstairs, Nate looks at Venti concerned and now fearing the worst...)
Nate Patrick: “???”
El Lucho Venti: “He make you special coffee mi amigo! You never learned the history of El Lucho Grande and his birth? One of many special talents?”
Nate Patrick: “No but I bet you’re going to tell me right buddy?”
El Lucho Venti: “Si! He has a special blend of café which was passed down from his family, one the likes of bucks of the stars and other companies have tried to buy off him! But he no sell out of fear he will be haunted by his dead family.”
Nate Patrick: “No offense, it looks like he’s urinating into a mug and doing god knows what else…”
(El Lucho Venti laughs and slaps Nate on the back harder than before this time, again the towel almost falling to the floor but Nate being able to catch it. He is lead to the bed and made to sit down while Venti now walks over to Grande to watch the master at work…
He begins to look around the room once more and regretting staying here…)
Nate Patrick: “I’m sorry for this room guys, I know I said it before, but I really am… But given our current financials, it came at a great price… Especially for my wallet since you guys have no money… Now please don’t make me drink your urine… it’s bad enough I’m gonna have to fuck that hippo…”
El Lucho Grande: “I KNEW IT AMIGO!!”
(Grande seemed so engrossed in his work that his surprise shout out to Nate startled him. Venti applauds the idea of Nate getting laid and walks over to the bed and sits beside Nate. Grande turns around with three steaming mugs of coffee which he holds in his hands…)
El Lucho Grande: “You know we give pay to orphans who have suffered to coffee related Incidents back home…”
Nate Patrick: “About that… IS that even a real thing?! I thought you guys would be like everyone else in this business, either rich or have gambling debts up to the eyeballs like Greg Cherry did.”
El Lucho Venti: “I GOT THAT!”
(He begins to laugh loudly slapping Nate on the back once again a little too hard for his liking. Grande laughs as well before approaching the two and offering a cup of java each. Venti takes his and Nate hesitantly takes his as well…)
El Lucho Grande: “Cheers mi amigo, for everything… Venti and I, El Lucho Grande appreciate all you have done since bringing us to the United States of America! You are a good manager and friend.”
Nate Patrick: “Damn… you know that means a lot to me hearing that.”
El Lucho Venti: “Now drink your coffee!”
El Lucho Grande: “And then we conquer T.V!!!”
Nate Patrick: “Para el café?”
(El Lucho Venti and Grande both look at each other and are probably grinning from under their masks…)
Grande/Venti: “Para el café!!!!!”
(All three take a sip from their cups, Venti and Grande through straws. Nate still hesitantly looks at the cup and takes a smell first. He has a watching audience of two and if this was going to be a bonding exercise, then he had to do it… So, he took a sip from the cup expecting the worst… After licking his lips, he takes another sip and it is there his fears are laid to rest….)
Nate Patrick: “This isn’t half bad… Now we really need to talk about the van…”
(And that was a conversation that didn’t need explaining to the two Luchadores, it went on for a while before all three decided to crash for the night. All three men laying on the bed spooning each other for warmth because god knows, there was no heating this room and they left the window open to let out some of the smells…
Night of course, turned too day and the ass crack of dawn came too once more. We find only Nate laying on the bed with the towel missing and his modesty on full display only with one small pixelated block to prevent it truly showing…
He holds his head and blocks the sunlight which shines down through the window… He rolls over and sits on the edge of the bed gathering his senses only to realize he is naked and more importantly, Venti and Grande are nowhere to be seen…)
Nate Patrick: “Oh god…”
(It is then a knock on the window is heard and Nate looks up to see Samantha the Motel Clerk standing at the window, her eyes wide with excitement as he stands up shocked before screaming once again as a girl before covering up his modesty…)
Nate Patrick: “What the hell… Why are you at the window?! What do you want?”
Motel Clerk: “Well I wanted to see if you fancied some breakfast, didn’t know you slept in nude if I did, I’d have invited ya to stay in the ol penthouse suite with me.”
Nate Patrick: “While I appreciate the offer, Im fine… Got a big day ahead us today so need to find some wheels so we can get back on the road… Speaking which, have you seen clients? They’re not here…”
Motel Clerk: “They’re out here waiting for ya…”
Nate Patrick: “They are?!”
(Nate rushes over to a bag and whips out a pair of briefs and puts them on before walking out onto the walkway of the motel. He looks down to see both Venti and Grande standing there with arms outstretched.)
Nate Patrick: “Guys, what are you doing out here?!”
El Lucho Venti: “Amigo! Come down we have surprise for you!”
(Nate goes back in and throws some shoes on, and a t-shirt n pants much to the chagrin of Samantha who enjoyed the view. He goes downstairs to see both men standing there proudly, his eyes divert to the van to see it looking clean and it has new wheels…)
El Lucho Venti: “They were true to their word! They came back and cleaned the van inside and out!”
El Lucho Grande: “And fixed the wheels!”
(Nate walks around the van in shock, this wasn’t what he expected to wake up too… Was he dreaming… Was the coffee he drank laced with some kind of drug… He didn’t know but he liked what he was seeing and hoped it wasn’t a fever dream… If it was it had turned to a nightmare when Samantha appeared downstairs now and standing beside Nate…
Motel Clerk: “You know they ain’t so bad once you get to know em are they?”
Nate Patrick: “Yeah they aren’t so bad…”
Motel Clerk: “They spoke very highly of you in that broken English of theirs and told me you were looking forward to staying here again… Well I’m gonna reserve a much better room for yall in future okay? Then you can take me out for dinner.”
(Nate says nothing, he just nods his head knowing that he was a man of his word… Venti and Grande watch with thumbs up to the potential happy couple as our camera now makes like a bird and begins to fly upwards revealing much more of the motel, including the back alley way where some men lay unconscious.. No doubt the ones who stole the wheels in the first place…
Para el café!!!)
==================================
El Lucho Grande vs Aaron Blackbourne
SCW TV Championship Match.
Bonjour, mi amigos!
I, El Lucho Grande have been given the opportunity to battle for the television! I am most excite for this rarest of the rare opportunities to be given to me because it means one thing can you guess what it is?! I get to be pretty like Peyton Rice!!! No… This isn’t it… Aha! I get to hold the remote control wherever we go!! You are most confuse I can tell as I write this to you! You see El Lucha Venti, while he looks like a cuddly member from the one Disney movie about death from our homeland, which name eludes me. He is most mean when it comes to the Flixnext and cold brew!!
Which is the case tonight when El Lucho Venti, I, El Lucho Grande and our bestest friend in the entire populous of the universe, Nate Patrick planned to sit down and prepare for this match! But Venti wanted to watch something else while I am told to watch matches of Aaron Blackbourne, one who is most creative… El Lucho Grande can be creative too, I like the farts and the paints. Yes, I do!! Maybe one day I will show you my work! Until we can afford such luxuries like a camera like everyone else is able to use, El Lucho Venti and Grande will make us of the pen! For it is mightier than the sword so Nate tells us…
Honestly, Venti and I believe he is cheap but maybe not, he is shrued businessman this is most true! He managed to get Grande a TV Title opportunity, didn’t he? Hehe… While the maniest of people were sad we left Mexico to conquer the America dream, I cannot deny It has been an exciting time touring the World with my hombre Venti and our Chupacabra, Nate Patrick… Arriving here in Supreme Champioonship Wrestling!!! You the people, the fans have most welcomed us with arms open!
You hold us tightly to your breasts like a mother would her child!
But we are not children, El Lucho Grande is a man! He faces another man in Aaron Blackbourne, the Champion of ALLLLLL TELEVISIO!!! Congratulations on your victory over the Pretty one. I am sorry to say I hoped you would lose but maybe I was bad luck… So Now I hope I LOSE! This way I can win, yes?! That is how this works isn’t it? I did not think about rooting for you or your mystery opponent who was Shilo Valiant? This name is most famous in our land of Mexico, he is one of entertainment and sodomy, so we recall… Many a donkey show his face adorns or is that the king of Kablam we think of?!! All is fair in coffee and war and this between us is a war now Blackbourne!
One of creativity, one of excellence, one of finesse!
From the very beginning since El Lucho Venti and I, El Lucho Grande joined SCW we have wished for opportunity, we wished for Tag Team Opportunities, going so far to take on all comers and being victorious! We have made enemies and zero friends so far and this is okay! Even though we have only tired to help make the tag division great again! We will not build any walls to prevent future opportunities when we become Tag Team Champions! Just like I will not deny anyone opportunity when I become TV Champion!
You are most good, very good, all the good even! Unpredictable maybe, but so is El Lucho Grande! I have many a trick up my sleeve as well, make my words true! Nate has shown Grande and Venti many a video of you, you have great abs, they are very intimidating if one wish to use you as a washboard! However, Grande does not wish to do this, but has no issue with turning you into surfboard!!!
You like to dress up, paint your face like its Halloween often. Your creative freedom we are told. But you are not the only one who does this in SCW! Grande looks around as does Venti, and we see the likes of Bree Lancaster, Jordan Majors, Syren Swann, and many other paints coat their faces with make up or paint! This is not unique to you my friend, unlike what Venti and Grande does with our masks and Luchador heritage!!
You would make a good Luchador.
But this is not an offer to you because right now we are at war! Which is all it is good for! We have opportunity to give fans a match they have never seen before, one they can take home with them to tell their children and their future children and then their future grandchildren… Unless Global warming kills us all before then… Which is not GOOD!! So, you see I must win so I can help spread message of taking care of our planet!
I must win so I can spread the message that coffee is beautiful!!
I MUST WIN BECAUSE… I WANT TO!
I did not believe I would get this opportunity, but I have and now I must make use of it because Grande understands Sasha only cares about those who love her? Aren’t that what people are saying?! I’m confused… Uno momento.
…
…
Aha, speaking with Venti and Nate they have informed me that I am wrong, which sounds absurd doesn’t it?! But I am and those people are idiots!!!
So, on Breakdown you will do battle with El Lucho Grande, how do you feel about this opportunity? This will be the first time you and I cross the paths! The first of many Grande hopes! Be it friends, allies or opponents! Know that The Lucha Bros will stand with any who challenge the goodness that is SCW! Free Coffee for ALL Faces! Bleach for all the HEELS!! But on more note of the serious, Lucha Bros know you have your own issues… You have ass trying to goad you into fights? We have giant Ass trying to sit on us and that doesn’t strike Grande or Venti very fun… Team of Zero ducks to give as well do not like us… So many distract could occur during our match, one which I will not let happen! Venti will not let happen. SCW Fans will NOT let happen… Although Grande is not sure what the fans could do other than boo if something did happen, they can warn us…
GENIUS!!!
Either way this TV Title Match will be one that I will do my utmost to victory! I will give you all I got, balls n all! You have something Grande now wants because it means I will gain control of the TV Remote when on the road with Venti and this is most import! I need to catch up on Game of Thrones! I am told the last season is very good! So, until then, I El Lucho Grande wish you the luck of the best! I know you will bring your all, it will be huge fight for Grande which is most Excite!!
So, I leave you with a hashtag which will trend throughout the world!!
#ParaElCafe
Adios, Amigos!!
Para el cafe.
For the Coffee.
(The animated doodle of El Lucho Grande hopping around the screen in various poses disappears when a cartoon van drives towards the screen. Its engine hums loudly before the angle changes and loud bang erupts as the exhaust explodes with a plume of smoke which engulfs the screen, it sounds like a gunshot to the point that the sound of neighbourhood dogs begin to bark loudly, cat’s screeching like Bree Lancaster and some alarms seem to go off all at once at the ass crack of dawn… The blackness of what was our smoke screen begins to dissipate to reveal we’re now IRL and a banged-up van which has seen better days draws to a screeching halt and a splutter…)
Nate Patrick: “God damn it, Gina stop with the noise already, I already had you serviced!!”
(The picture changes to inside the van which to the untrained eye could be considered the strangest of images if it were to be an artwork… The two masked men known as El Lucho Grande & El Lucho Venti sat behind a much smaller and uglier Nate Patrick who hits the steering wheel with his forehead causing the horn to sound briefly… Both Mexicans look to the other with Grande speaking up in a thick French accent…)
El Lucho Grande: “Monsieur, what is a Gina? Is this the Gina G which is so popular in Le Mexico?!”
Nate Patrick: “Who? Oh… Uh no, this Gina was my third Ex-Wife, god knows she was a loud one so she could have rivalled whoever you’re talking about...”
El Lucho Venti: “Loud… Is this because she liked the Nates penis or was jealous of his fabulouslo hair?”
(Venti leans forward now and begins to stroke the flowing mane that is the mullet of Nate Patrick, he moves his head away swatting Venti’s hand like it were a fly, the Luchador falling back into his chair sad…)
Nate Patrick: “Would you stop that, I’m not a pussy… That guy was an asshole trying to start a fight in the last town when he said that, which by the way I’d appreciate you not laughing next time!!!”
El Lucho Grande: “See hombre, I told you!!”
(Grande open hand chops Venti across the chest while the camera focuses in on Nate who sighs, now thinking back to the times he had with his ex-wife Gina and ponders the life they could have had before he decided that managing pro wrestlers was the way to go… She didn’t agree and left with the mailman who apparently had a real job, that jerk… Anyway! The veteran manager of the greatest team to come out of Mexico since Taco & Bell turns around to find both of his talents have already exited the van. Outside in the Motel parking lot El Lucho Venti is performing lunges to stretch his legs after the long ride from the airport and El Lucho Grande is performing forward rolls only to stop when Venti notices him heading towards incoming traffic so rushes over to prevent an accident…)
Nate Patrick: “Guys… Stay away from traffic yeah, I’d hate to explain that to SCW!”
(Venti having pulled Grande up to his feet now who appeared a little dizzy wave’s off Nate who leans back into the driver’s seat. He looks back at the number of bags at the back and shrugs his shoulders…)
Nate Patrick: “Why were they playing in traffic? Oh you know… reasons… that’d go down well… Ugh… Guess I’ll get the bags then… but first should probably get the rooms sorted.”
(Nate exits the van and heads towards the motel office to collect the keys and pay for the rooms, once he enters through the door, the bell sounds and with that there is a switch which seems to flick on inside him and the Nate which is seen on TV appears in the flesh… He takes a pause though due to the unsavoury “aroma” of the office itself but digs deep as he flashes his pearly whites, and entertains the most confident of swagger without wanting to vomit…
Sat behind the counter is a rather large woman, large enough to consider her body mass was equal to the butt cheeks of Kandis. She is sat watching TV while eating some Chinese takeout completely ignoring Nates presence as he struts to the counter and hits the bell….)
Nate Patrick: “scuse’ me darlin’ can I have a quick minute of your time?”
(The woman behind the counter removes a dumpling from the box and shoves it in her mouth as she turns to look at Nate, the moment she sees him her eyes light up and she looks to have swallowed said dumpling whole with an inhale, frightening… Grabbing a napkin she wipes her fingers and face clean and licks her lips before adjusting her bra accordingly which sends a shiver down the spine of Nate’s….
Her attention now fully on the snazzy dressed manager of Venti and Grande…)
Motel Clerk: “Well hello there to you too darling, I didn’t hear you come in… how can I help?”
Nate Patrick: “… Ya’ll didn’t hear the explosion that came from my van moments ago?”
Motel Clerk: “Oh that were you, I thought those gang bangers were up to their usual tricks!”
(Nate took a pause for a moment to let that sink in, but then shrugged it off because he had two pro wrestlers outside who were experienced in fighting crime in the land of Mexico in their spare time when they weren’t wrestling. Plus, this wasn’t the Bellagio after all, it was some dump of a motel which was cheap to him the price was very right…)
Nate Patrick: “Oh those gang bangers are always up to no good, so I see ya’ll are busy and I’m truly sorry for disturbing your evening meal darling, which looks delightful by the way I do love me some old Chinese takeout.”
Motel Clerk: “Who doesn’t honey?”
Nate Patrick: “Agreed! But to be honest, while I can speak of the finer tastes of Chinese food all night with ya, it has been a loooong few days for yours truly. Flew in on a red eye flight from London and to be honest I’m beat… So are my clients and with that said, while you and I we could talk later if you please. Right now, I would very much like to get the keys to our rooms, the name is Nate Patrick part of three.”
Motel Clerk: “Hmm… Lemme check the book for a moment… Name don’t ring a bell…”
(Nates heart sinks a little with concern that his booking might night have gone through now; the clerk turns on her plump legs and waddles over to another desk where a book resides next to a phone. The get up looks all so very old fashioned you could say, she goes through the pages with a hum of one of the many, many food commercials…
While she’s busy, Nate looks outside to see the two wrestling each other outside. Grande lifting Venti up onto his shoulders and running towards the van before ramming him into it…)
Nate Patrick: “What the…”
Motel Clerk: “Oh there you are, took a moment to find ya! Nate Patrick, Party of three. You like to party huh?”
(The clerk laughed at her own joke which prompts Nate to do the same, he was a salesman, a professional speaker, and was now trying to sell himself to the point this woman gave them a damn room but all she looked like doing was devouring him like one of those dumplings…)
Motel Clerk: “I found ya here Nate, but the problem here is that we’ve only got the one room left. Our prices are cheap as you probably know, so they’re popular. We got ourselves a lot of pro’s out there using them for their work and…”
(The belt once again sounds from the door to the office and when it does, the Clerk drops the book to the countertop and her eyes widen a little like she had just found out her next meal was a salad…)
Nate Patrick: “You okay darlin’? You’re not about to have a stroke on me are ya?!”
Motel Clerk: “… Oh my god please don’t hurt me…”
(Nate looks at her weirdly he is not sure what it is she is talking about at first, this changes when he turns around and notices Grande and Venti now standing behind him striking two different poses… As soon as he realizes he laughs it off and gets his attention back on the clerk who isn’t sure what is going on…)
Nate Patrick: “What?! Oh, sweet cheeks, you got yourself nothin’ to fear, these here are the clients I were speaking about! Fellas introduce yourselves to the fine young lady please before you give her a coronary.”
(Hearing the words fine and young, puts a smile on the lips of the motel clerk once again but those words merely confuse poor Venti and Grande, Nate only hopes they don’t say something he’ll regret later…)
El Lucho Venti: “Hola! It is most honorable to make a visage of one so big! I am El Lucho Venti! This ihere is my partner, El Lucho Grande!”
(Venti slaps Grande in the chest proudly and nods, Grande stands there posing like a would-be superhero still with his hands on his hips… Nate half smiles knowing all to well this could have gone a lot worse…)
Motel Clerk: “Oh… your... Partner? Wow ya’ll tellin me I have a couple of gay Luchadores stayin at my motel?! My oh my!”
(Nate stands there wide eyed as Grande and Venti look at each other confused for a moment, they both nod in unison however…)
El Lucho Grande: “Happy we very are to be in United States, very Gay GAY GAY GAY!!”
Motel Clerk: “Well that’s awesome honey, it is 2019 now after all. You’re free to be whatever you want to be!”
El Lucho Grande: “Yes! This is true! Therefore, you are hippo, yes?!”
El Lucho Venti: “Oooh, Good EYE esse!!”
(The Clerk looks at both men and begins to go red, we’re unsure if its due to rage, her high blood pressure or embarrassment… Nate however leaps into the rescue because sleeping in the van was not an option, especially if there WERE gang bangers outside somewhere lurking… and sure as hell didn’t want to end up with another corpse on his hands…
What?
What…?)
Nate Patrick: “Whoa, whoa, there fellas, be nice to the lady. My apologies Mrs… I assume there is a Mr somewhere around here?”
Motel Clerk: “My name is Samantha… and I’m not a Mrs no one has been able to tie me down…”
(Both Lucha’s look at each other and Grande whispers in the ear of Venti and they both give each other a nod and thumbs up. Samantha the clerk watches em both before Nate interjects to save the moment…)
Nate Patrick: “REALLY?! Well then, Miss Samantha… Please accept my most humble apology on the behest of my clients here... They aren’t from round these parts as you can see and well…”
Motel Clerk: “He compared me to a hippo…?”
Nate Patrick: “Well, ya ever been to Mexico darling?”
Motel Clerk: “Well no, I’ve never led an extravagant life… Besides I thought we were building a damn wall to keep folks like that outta here? Especially if they are gonna insult me…”
Nate Patrick: “Well… where he’s from it considered a term of endearment, to him it means you have a lot more to love ya know? He meant nothing by it, I swear! Besides what does he know he’s gay.”
(This brought a chuckle from Samantha the Motel Clerk, her attention and the redness in her face beginning to fade out, well not that much… Grande and Venti both looked at each other and Nate could feel them wanting to say something so spun around and gave them both a look which they got immediately…)
Nate Patrick: “Fellas, why don’t you go out to the van and start grabbing our stuff…?”
El Lucho Grande: “Hai!”
El Lucho Venti: “Si amigo! Good luck sticking your penis inside it.”
(Both men turn and exit the office leaving Nate wide eyed in shock at what they just said… It was a moment he wished they spoke in one of the many foreign languages… a moment Grande would have not Venti… He turns around to see Samantha eyeing him like he were a pork chop and she was a lioness, albeit a rather fat lioness at that getting ideas…)
Motel Clerk: “Did your gay little friend say you wanted to stick your penis inside me honey?”
Nate Patrick: “… He did…”
Motel Clerk: “Well if you play ya cards right, maybe that can happen. But you’d have to buy me dinner first and I’ve just eaten so…”
(Nate being the ever-opportunistic businessman see his opening…)
Nate Patrick: “So another time then? We travel a lot darling, always trying to find cheap accommodation for the night. Depending on how great the room is, we could easily make this our main spot while traveling the east coast.”
Motel Clerk: “Oh really? Well I’m sure we could come to some sort of arrangement darling…”
(Samantha the clerk winking at Nate who gulped nothing but air but smiled all the same, he really did not wish to sleep in the van with Venti and Grande, they both like to spoon. She whips out her book again and motions for Nate to come closer, she wishes to smell him but also get his signature and contact details for future bookings… Nate obliges of course, he had to and after another thirty minutes or so Nate has left the office feeling a lot dirtier than before he arrived if that were even possible…
Stepping outside and allowing the cold Chicago air to cool him down and hoping wash off the scent he had accumulated while in there, Grande and Venti are now sat on top of the van waiting for him…)
Nate Patrick: “Guys! What are you doing up there, where are the bags?!”
El Lucho Venti: “Tell us did you get date?”
Nate Patrick: “I’ll tell you later, where are the…”
(Nate approaches the van to see the bags haven’t been removed, but he looks down to see the wheels have… The van now sitting on a set of bricks…)
Nate Patrick: “Oh no no no no… What the hell?! When did this happen?!”
El Lucho Grande: “It is okay! They will bring them back! They promised amigo!”
Nate Patrick: “What?!”
El Lucho Venti: “The tire restorers of course! They noticed how worn they were and offered to fix them for free!”
Nate Patrick: “… This is a joke, right? You know what… Lets talk about it upstairs in the room, I can’t stand here all night and let people watch.”
El Lucho Grande: “No one wants to see you cry amigo, especially Venti and Grande.”
(Nate sighs, he nods and approaches the van and is hell bent on getting inside this room of theres they have. A good sleep will do wonders and then the three can begin the photo signings arranged by SCW to promote Breakdown given El lucho Grande has a huge TV Title opportunity…
He pulls out the bags and throws one over his shoulder while holding the other two, he is struggling but isn’t going to be defeated, this is the sort of thing he signed up for and wasn’t going to let it beat him, he was married three times before so this was going to be a breeze!
All three men went up to the room as our camera shot changes to within it, the fumbling of the key is what give it away and with that the door opens with a click and swings open with Nate Patrick falling through it thanks to El Lucho Grande pushing him through the door with both Luchadores leaping over him into the room. El Lucho Grande walks over to the bathroom and switches on the light in there, El Lucho Venti turns on the light by the door, both Luchaodres look at each other and then down at Nate Patrick and reach down to him. He extends his hands and both men pick up their bags and walk over to the bed…)
Nate Patrick: “Guys, what the hell you can at least help me up!?!”
El Lucho Grande: “Apologize Mi Amigo!”
(El Lucho Venti looks over to Grande and nods with his head motioning to Nate, the larger Luchadore approaching and helping him up to his feet finally before dusting him down which happened to be a lot of dust on the floor… Nate looks around the room after shutting the door and winces a little at the state it is in…)
Nate Patrick: “Thanks buddy, god this room is a shit hole… You really do get what you pay for don’t you… I’m sorry guys…”
El Lucho Venti: “We have worse beds before, right Grande?”
El Lucho Grande: “Si!”
(Grande offers a thumbs up to Nate before giving him a hug and a pat on the back and then the head… Truth was Nate needed that kind of interaction from Grande because he always came across as an asshole… But then he’d have moments like this which made all his other moments worth it. Their star was shining in Supreme Championship Wrestling after all and could shine even brighter soon… With the GOLD variety which meant better money, and better lodgings!!
An hour passes by and both Venti and Grande are sat at the end of the bed watching TV, Nate has left the bathroom with a robe around his waist which he owned, not the hotel… He shudders as he does however…)
Nate Patrick: “I’m telling you fellas, I’m afraid what we might find if we shone a black light in that bathroom or here for that matter… I’d have a feeling it’d be the same as the inside of Kandis underwear if you know what I mean?”
(There is no reaction from both Venti and Grande although Nate laughed at his own joke at the expense of one of the people wanting to attack his team of wrestling legends. He walks further in and stands in front of the TV both attention of the men sat at the edge of the bed who throw their arms up in the air!)
El Lucho Grande: “AMIGO! MOVE!!”
Nate Patrick: “Well don’t ignore me then fellas. What are you doing anyway?! What are you watching?”
El Lucho Venti: “Grande is preparing his brain for TV Title Match! He will learn all of Television tonight and be prepared most greatly for all general knowledge questions thrown at him!!”
Nate Patrick: “What…? No guys that isn’t how this works… C’mon now.”
El Lucho Grande: “We not on gameshow like Jeapordy?!”
Nate Patrick: “… No? You’re wrestling! For the TV Championship, a title belt you know what they are!!!”
El Lucho Grande: “… Santa mierda!!! When did this happen?!”
El Lucho Venti: “We did not expect this so soon, we did not know this could happen we are tag team!”
Nate Patrick: “And this is a singles match, a huge match for you Grande… One worthy of your name!”
(Grande sits there looking concerned, he holds his head in his hands while Nate focuses on Venti now….)
El Lucho Venti: “We wanted to offer spot in Lucho Bros as honorary sister to Regan Helms! She would be great addition unlike Trenta who a very weak coffee is.”
(Nate ponders the thought for a moment, but immediately throws it to the side. Regan Helms would never dream of teaming with these two as a trio, besides who would want to put a mask on that beautiful face of hers? That was the money right there as twitter showcased often. But not wanting to deter his clients Nate holds up a finger first… plus he didn’t want to make too many enemies for them here in SCW…)
Nate Patrick: “You know what, lets put a pin in that idea for now and stick it on the wall of ideas for the future. Right now, we need to focus on the present and Grande… Where did Grande go?!”
(Venti looks to his side and throws his arms up in shock, he was there one moment and gone then next. Nate blinked only a moment as well, but he was there one moment, gone the next like a true ninja of the night... Evidently one of the many skills of El Lucho Grande which put the fear of god into criminals in his native Mexico…
Nate turns around and screams like a teenage girl before jumping back to find Grande standing behind him… This gets an applause from Venti who laughs obviously in on the joke...)
El Lucho Venti: “You sound like El Chupacabra!”
El Lucho Grande: “Ha!!! Our amigo did!”
Nate Patrick: “Guys, you need to focus you know that right? We must prepare for what is going to no doubt happen on Breakdown… You’ve made a few enemies already and...”
El Lucho Grande: “Café haters!”
Nate Patrick: “Yes, they hate coffee… and you guys and you know why?”
El Lucho Venti: “Because we are beautiful?”
(Grande turns to Venti and nods offering another, thumbs up. Nate sighs… This was going to be a long night he believed…)
Nate Patrick: “This could be huge guys, I know it might be hard and unexpected, but really this could push your brand high. You could focus on your brand of coffee, you could…”
El Lucho Grande: “CAFFE CELEBRATIONS!!”
(Venti stepped away from the bed and approaches Nate slapping him on the shoulder, the towel almost dropping from his waist, but he manages to hold onto it. Venti nods to Grande he walks over to his bag and removes three mugs and places them on the sideboard of the room. With his back to the other two he reaches down and unzips…)
Nate Patrick: “So I really think you have a shot at this TV Title Grande… Hey… Uh what’s he doing…?”
(It sounds like he is humming to himself while doing something downstairs, Nate looks at Venti concerned and now fearing the worst...)
Nate Patrick: “???”
El Lucho Venti: “He make you special coffee mi amigo! You never learned the history of El Lucho Grande and his birth? One of many special talents?”
Nate Patrick: “No but I bet you’re going to tell me right buddy?”
El Lucho Venti: “Si! He has a special blend of café which was passed down from his family, one the likes of bucks of the stars and other companies have tried to buy off him! But he no sell out of fear he will be haunted by his dead family.”
Nate Patrick: “No offense, it looks like he’s urinating into a mug and doing god knows what else…”
(El Lucho Venti laughs and slaps Nate on the back harder than before this time, again the towel almost falling to the floor but Nate being able to catch it. He is lead to the bed and made to sit down while Venti now walks over to Grande to watch the master at work…
He begins to look around the room once more and regretting staying here…)
Nate Patrick: “I’m sorry for this room guys, I know I said it before, but I really am… But given our current financials, it came at a great price… Especially for my wallet since you guys have no money… Now please don’t make me drink your urine… it’s bad enough I’m gonna have to fuck that hippo…”
El Lucho Grande: “I KNEW IT AMIGO!!”
(Grande seemed so engrossed in his work that his surprise shout out to Nate startled him. Venti applauds the idea of Nate getting laid and walks over to the bed and sits beside Nate. Grande turns around with three steaming mugs of coffee which he holds in his hands…)
El Lucho Grande: “You know we give pay to orphans who have suffered to coffee related Incidents back home…”
Nate Patrick: “About that… IS that even a real thing?! I thought you guys would be like everyone else in this business, either rich or have gambling debts up to the eyeballs like Greg Cherry did.”
El Lucho Venti: “I GOT THAT!”
(He begins to laugh loudly slapping Nate on the back once again a little too hard for his liking. Grande laughs as well before approaching the two and offering a cup of java each. Venti takes his and Nate hesitantly takes his as well…)
El Lucho Grande: “Cheers mi amigo, for everything… Venti and I, El Lucho Grande appreciate all you have done since bringing us to the United States of America! You are a good manager and friend.”
Nate Patrick: “Damn… you know that means a lot to me hearing that.”
El Lucho Venti: “Now drink your coffee!”
El Lucho Grande: “And then we conquer T.V!!!”
Nate Patrick: “Para el café?”
(El Lucho Venti and Grande both look at each other and are probably grinning from under their masks…)
Grande/Venti: “Para el café!!!!!”
(All three take a sip from their cups, Venti and Grande through straws. Nate still hesitantly looks at the cup and takes a smell first. He has a watching audience of two and if this was going to be a bonding exercise, then he had to do it… So, he took a sip from the cup expecting the worst… After licking his lips, he takes another sip and it is there his fears are laid to rest….)
Nate Patrick: “This isn’t half bad… Now we really need to talk about the van…”
(And that was a conversation that didn’t need explaining to the two Luchadores, it went on for a while before all three decided to crash for the night. All three men laying on the bed spooning each other for warmth because god knows, there was no heating this room and they left the window open to let out some of the smells…
Night of course, turned too day and the ass crack of dawn came too once more. We find only Nate laying on the bed with the towel missing and his modesty on full display only with one small pixelated block to prevent it truly showing…
He holds his head and blocks the sunlight which shines down through the window… He rolls over and sits on the edge of the bed gathering his senses only to realize he is naked and more importantly, Venti and Grande are nowhere to be seen…)
Nate Patrick: “Oh god…”
(It is then a knock on the window is heard and Nate looks up to see Samantha the Motel Clerk standing at the window, her eyes wide with excitement as he stands up shocked before screaming once again as a girl before covering up his modesty…)
Nate Patrick: “What the hell… Why are you at the window?! What do you want?”
Motel Clerk: “Well I wanted to see if you fancied some breakfast, didn’t know you slept in nude if I did, I’d have invited ya to stay in the ol penthouse suite with me.”
Nate Patrick: “While I appreciate the offer, Im fine… Got a big day ahead us today so need to find some wheels so we can get back on the road… Speaking which, have you seen clients? They’re not here…”
Motel Clerk: “They’re out here waiting for ya…”
Nate Patrick: “They are?!”
(Nate rushes over to a bag and whips out a pair of briefs and puts them on before walking out onto the walkway of the motel. He looks down to see both Venti and Grande standing there with arms outstretched.)
Nate Patrick: “Guys, what are you doing out here?!”
El Lucho Venti: “Amigo! Come down we have surprise for you!”
(Nate goes back in and throws some shoes on, and a t-shirt n pants much to the chagrin of Samantha who enjoyed the view. He goes downstairs to see both men standing there proudly, his eyes divert to the van to see it looking clean and it has new wheels…)
El Lucho Venti: “They were true to their word! They came back and cleaned the van inside and out!”
El Lucho Grande: “And fixed the wheels!”
(Nate walks around the van in shock, this wasn’t what he expected to wake up too… Was he dreaming… Was the coffee he drank laced with some kind of drug… He didn’t know but he liked what he was seeing and hoped it wasn’t a fever dream… If it was it had turned to a nightmare when Samantha appeared downstairs now and standing beside Nate…
Motel Clerk: “You know they ain’t so bad once you get to know em are they?”
Nate Patrick: “Yeah they aren’t so bad…”
Motel Clerk: “They spoke very highly of you in that broken English of theirs and told me you were looking forward to staying here again… Well I’m gonna reserve a much better room for yall in future okay? Then you can take me out for dinner.”
(Nate says nothing, he just nods his head knowing that he was a man of his word… Venti and Grande watch with thumbs up to the potential happy couple as our camera now makes like a bird and begins to fly upwards revealing much more of the motel, including the back alley way where some men lay unconscious.. No doubt the ones who stole the wheels in the first place…
Para el café!!!)
==================================
El Lucho Grande vs Aaron Blackbourne
SCW TV Championship Match.
Bonjour, mi amigos!
I, El Lucho Grande have been given the opportunity to battle for the television! I am most excite for this rarest of the rare opportunities to be given to me because it means one thing can you guess what it is?! I get to be pretty like Peyton Rice!!! No… This isn’t it… Aha! I get to hold the remote control wherever we go!! You are most confuse I can tell as I write this to you! You see El Lucha Venti, while he looks like a cuddly member from the one Disney movie about death from our homeland, which name eludes me. He is most mean when it comes to the Flixnext and cold brew!!
Which is the case tonight when El Lucho Venti, I, El Lucho Grande and our bestest friend in the entire populous of the universe, Nate Patrick planned to sit down and prepare for this match! But Venti wanted to watch something else while I am told to watch matches of Aaron Blackbourne, one who is most creative… El Lucho Grande can be creative too, I like the farts and the paints. Yes, I do!! Maybe one day I will show you my work! Until we can afford such luxuries like a camera like everyone else is able to use, El Lucho Venti and Grande will make us of the pen! For it is mightier than the sword so Nate tells us…
Honestly, Venti and I believe he is cheap but maybe not, he is shrued businessman this is most true! He managed to get Grande a TV Title opportunity, didn’t he? Hehe… While the maniest of people were sad we left Mexico to conquer the America dream, I cannot deny It has been an exciting time touring the World with my hombre Venti and our Chupacabra, Nate Patrick… Arriving here in Supreme Champioonship Wrestling!!! You the people, the fans have most welcomed us with arms open!
You hold us tightly to your breasts like a mother would her child!
But we are not children, El Lucho Grande is a man! He faces another man in Aaron Blackbourne, the Champion of ALLLLLL TELEVISIO!!! Congratulations on your victory over the Pretty one. I am sorry to say I hoped you would lose but maybe I was bad luck… So Now I hope I LOSE! This way I can win, yes?! That is how this works isn’t it? I did not think about rooting for you or your mystery opponent who was Shilo Valiant? This name is most famous in our land of Mexico, he is one of entertainment and sodomy, so we recall… Many a donkey show his face adorns or is that the king of Kablam we think of?!! All is fair in coffee and war and this between us is a war now Blackbourne!
One of creativity, one of excellence, one of finesse!
From the very beginning since El Lucho Venti and I, El Lucho Grande joined SCW we have wished for opportunity, we wished for Tag Team Opportunities, going so far to take on all comers and being victorious! We have made enemies and zero friends so far and this is okay! Even though we have only tired to help make the tag division great again! We will not build any walls to prevent future opportunities when we become Tag Team Champions! Just like I will not deny anyone opportunity when I become TV Champion!
You are most good, very good, all the good even! Unpredictable maybe, but so is El Lucho Grande! I have many a trick up my sleeve as well, make my words true! Nate has shown Grande and Venti many a video of you, you have great abs, they are very intimidating if one wish to use you as a washboard! However, Grande does not wish to do this, but has no issue with turning you into surfboard!!!
You like to dress up, paint your face like its Halloween often. Your creative freedom we are told. But you are not the only one who does this in SCW! Grande looks around as does Venti, and we see the likes of Bree Lancaster, Jordan Majors, Syren Swann, and many other paints coat their faces with make up or paint! This is not unique to you my friend, unlike what Venti and Grande does with our masks and Luchador heritage!!
You would make a good Luchador.
But this is not an offer to you because right now we are at war! Which is all it is good for! We have opportunity to give fans a match they have never seen before, one they can take home with them to tell their children and their future children and then their future grandchildren… Unless Global warming kills us all before then… Which is not GOOD!! So, you see I must win so I can help spread message of taking care of our planet!
I must win so I can spread the message that coffee is beautiful!!
I MUST WIN BECAUSE… I WANT TO!
I did not believe I would get this opportunity, but I have and now I must make use of it because Grande understands Sasha only cares about those who love her? Aren’t that what people are saying?! I’m confused… Uno momento.
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Aha, speaking with Venti and Nate they have informed me that I am wrong, which sounds absurd doesn’t it?! But I am and those people are idiots!!!
So, on Breakdown you will do battle with El Lucho Grande, how do you feel about this opportunity? This will be the first time you and I cross the paths! The first of many Grande hopes! Be it friends, allies or opponents! Know that The Lucha Bros will stand with any who challenge the goodness that is SCW! Free Coffee for ALL Faces! Bleach for all the HEELS!! But on more note of the serious, Lucha Bros know you have your own issues… You have ass trying to goad you into fights? We have giant Ass trying to sit on us and that doesn’t strike Grande or Venti very fun… Team of Zero ducks to give as well do not like us… So many distract could occur during our match, one which I will not let happen! Venti will not let happen. SCW Fans will NOT let happen… Although Grande is not sure what the fans could do other than boo if something did happen, they can warn us…
GENIUS!!!
Either way this TV Title Match will be one that I will do my utmost to victory! I will give you all I got, balls n all! You have something Grande now wants because it means I will gain control of the TV Remote when on the road with Venti and this is most import! I need to catch up on Game of Thrones! I am told the last season is very good! So, until then, I El Lucho Grande wish you the luck of the best! I know you will bring your all, it will be huge fight for Grande which is most Excite!!
So, I leave you with a hashtag which will trend throughout the world!!
#ParaElCafe
Adios, Amigos!!
![[Image: WE9I2ki.png]](https://i.imgur.com/WE9I2ki.png)