04-14-2021, 09:39 PM
The following aired recently as a paid advertisement during The 700 Club. While we are uncertain of who actually foot the bill for the commercial time, it can be certain that whomever did would want to ensure that you understand the views and opinions expressed within were solely those of it’s subject, Derek Adonis, and not of The 700 Club, the network upon which it airs, nor it’s other advertisers or affiliates. Thank you, and blessed be...
“Brothers and sisters, I wish for but a moment of your precious time.”
As the scene opens up, Derek Adonis can be seen in a plain, boring, black suit. His hair is combed to the side, and he wears a pair of eyeglasses set carefully upon his nose.
“Two weeks ago, you witnessed a miracle. You may not have viewed as a miracle at the time. Instead, you may have seen it as an abomination… a disgusting act perpetrated by yours truly upon an innocent young lady named Kandis and her loyal, loving boyfriend, Thomas Valentine. You may have even considered their virtue tarnished by my clearly involuntary actions, and The Lawrd would grant you that freedom. However, I believe that the Godless narrative parroted against me in the hours, days, and weeks since the night of April the first has been wholly inaccurate. Allow me to explain.”
Adonis clears his throat as he leans forward, his hands resting upon his lectern. He removes his glasses and looks square into the camera.
“On that night, the Lawrd saw fit in His infinite wisdom to test my faith and my will. He did so by presenting me with my previous weakness - through a temptation of the flesh, presented through His vessel, Kandis. He had sought to see if I would revert to my previous, sinful self and indulge in the temptations she provided in His duty, and had His other vessel, Thomas, ready to strike should I have failed His test. But I did not fail. Oh no… the flesh, though tempting, was NOT enough to break the faith or the will of the New Derek Adonis!”
He hangs his head a little bit.
“I will admit the test was difficult. Any lesser individual, male or female, would have been broken under the spell of the vivacious curves of Kandis’ derriere. Any person offered would have to have been insane to reject her advances and not give into a simply blowy behind the curtain or a…”
Adonis catches the saliva starting to form in the corner of his mouth before he abruptly stops himself, shaking his head as though it had become filled with cobwebs.
“No… no, I am not going to be led down that path. Not now, not ever. Because on that night, it took everything within me to resist the temptation laid before me… the veritable smorgasbord of curves, of flesh. I had to dig down deep inside and muster up all of my intestinal fortitude. I had to dig out my willpower. I had to dig down to the very core of my faith. I had to dig down to the bean burrito I had for dinner prior to the contest. But as the contents of my stomach emptied first onto Kandis, and the remnants found their way onto Thomas, I found my salvation! I found release from the old and Heaven in the new! I am His willing subject, and through me, the Lawrd shall penetrate into your hearts and your minds and offer you that salvation too! Diamond Steele has not a conflict on the horizon. Oh no. She has an opportunity… a chance to come into His bosom and embrace the Good News! But she cannot be led there by force. There must be consent in her embrace. She will not come to Him without said consent, for He does not delve in forced conversions… not after the last time.”
Adonis regains his composure, looking back towards the camera as he grins.
“So Diamond Steele, as I KNOW you are going to be consuming this media and I want you to know that I am not your enemy. On the contrary… I am here to guide you to Him! All you need to do is accept his embrace, fall to your knees and take him into your heart! Repent from your sinful ways! Repent from your rock and roll lifestyle and find Him waiting! You will be welcomed, child… this I guarantee! Hallelujah! Hallelujah!”
Adonis smiles as this commercial slowly goes to black.
“Brothers and sisters, I wish for but a moment of your precious time.”
As the scene opens up, Derek Adonis can be seen in a plain, boring, black suit. His hair is combed to the side, and he wears a pair of eyeglasses set carefully upon his nose.
“Two weeks ago, you witnessed a miracle. You may not have viewed as a miracle at the time. Instead, you may have seen it as an abomination… a disgusting act perpetrated by yours truly upon an innocent young lady named Kandis and her loyal, loving boyfriend, Thomas Valentine. You may have even considered their virtue tarnished by my clearly involuntary actions, and The Lawrd would grant you that freedom. However, I believe that the Godless narrative parroted against me in the hours, days, and weeks since the night of April the first has been wholly inaccurate. Allow me to explain.”
Adonis clears his throat as he leans forward, his hands resting upon his lectern. He removes his glasses and looks square into the camera.
“On that night, the Lawrd saw fit in His infinite wisdom to test my faith and my will. He did so by presenting me with my previous weakness - through a temptation of the flesh, presented through His vessel, Kandis. He had sought to see if I would revert to my previous, sinful self and indulge in the temptations she provided in His duty, and had His other vessel, Thomas, ready to strike should I have failed His test. But I did not fail. Oh no… the flesh, though tempting, was NOT enough to break the faith or the will of the New Derek Adonis!”
He hangs his head a little bit.
“I will admit the test was difficult. Any lesser individual, male or female, would have been broken under the spell of the vivacious curves of Kandis’ derriere. Any person offered would have to have been insane to reject her advances and not give into a simply blowy behind the curtain or a…”
Adonis catches the saliva starting to form in the corner of his mouth before he abruptly stops himself, shaking his head as though it had become filled with cobwebs.
“No… no, I am not going to be led down that path. Not now, not ever. Because on that night, it took everything within me to resist the temptation laid before me… the veritable smorgasbord of curves, of flesh. I had to dig down deep inside and muster up all of my intestinal fortitude. I had to dig out my willpower. I had to dig down to the very core of my faith. I had to dig down to the bean burrito I had for dinner prior to the contest. But as the contents of my stomach emptied first onto Kandis, and the remnants found their way onto Thomas, I found my salvation! I found release from the old and Heaven in the new! I am His willing subject, and through me, the Lawrd shall penetrate into your hearts and your minds and offer you that salvation too! Diamond Steele has not a conflict on the horizon. Oh no. She has an opportunity… a chance to come into His bosom and embrace the Good News! But she cannot be led there by force. There must be consent in her embrace. She will not come to Him without said consent, for He does not delve in forced conversions… not after the last time.”
Adonis regains his composure, looking back towards the camera as he grins.
“So Diamond Steele, as I KNOW you are going to be consuming this media and I want you to know that I am not your enemy. On the contrary… I am here to guide you to Him! All you need to do is accept his embrace, fall to your knees and take him into your heart! Repent from your sinful ways! Repent from your rock and roll lifestyle and find Him waiting! You will be welcomed, child… this I guarantee! Hallelujah! Hallelujah!”
Adonis smiles as this commercial slowly goes to black.
![[Image: vJXLyBV.png]](https://i.imgur.com/vJXLyBV.png)