Deanna Frost vs. Sarah Wolf

[SnowQueenSCW]

The Guard Tower

So, I’ve got to head into another Breakdown fresh off a title loss. And you know, this one kind of stings a little more than the last one. I mean, losing the Television title after being told I wasn’t ‘good enough’ by the future world champion was hard enough, and to lose it because it took a stable and a woman with a chair and my opponent using the tights to keep me down… yeah, that all sucked.

But to lose at my first title defence again, in my hometown of Manhattan – first time I ever really wrestled there on a pay-per-view stage because last time I was just a manager to my wife winning the world title… and then to be the one that wasn’t pinned.

I can’t really think of other words for it: it sucks. Sucks bad. 

And I know, I really have no one else to blame for this but myself. I let myself get knocked out of that ring by Autumn. I let myself lose focus from the rest of the action in the ring. I let myself miss the other combatants fighting. And I knew the rules, the champion’s disadvantage – and it was an Underground Championship match! A match where there was no rules so my opponents did nothing wrong. The only person I can hold accountable is me. I lost the Underground title and I am no longer the Underground Champion.

So where does that leave me? Do I just sulk away? Do I throw a tantrum and demand a rematch like Kimberly did? Do I cry about people being right that I don’t belong here or there or in this match or that match or this division or that division?

Or do I say ‘to hell with that!’ and start acting like a damn SCW superstar?!

Yeah, I lost, but let me tell you what else I did! I’m the one that had superstar after superstar down and out to the point that someone else had to run in and break up my pins to keep the match going! Seriously, nobody else had so many falls that ended by interference when the opponent stayed down! Nobody else came close as many times as I did to winning that match. You know what else? I’m the one that took a fork to the head, Legos to the back, chairs all over me and yet, aside from the winner, was the ONLY person to walk out of that match on my own volition! Autumn? Out cold. The One? Out like a light! And Wolf? Yeah, huffed and puffed and blew herself down!

No, I’m not taking solace in any of that over losing the championship, but if you think I didn’t prove something at Apocalypse, Sarah, then you are sorely mistaken. I proved that, much as you and The One and whomever else tells me otherwise, I DO belong here. No, screw that, I belong in all of SCW! Any division, any match, against any opponent, I belong here! For almost a year, I’ve been trying to prove that I do. That I am as much of a wrestler as my beloved wife is and I have been trying to prove that I can hold my own and be my own woman here rather than just “Selena Frost’s wife”.

And you know what, Sarah? The fact that I defended the title against four of the most dangerous women in SCW? And I managed to walk out on my own while you were helped by officials? That says something.

No, it doesn’t say you are weak or overhyped. Far from it. The fact that I am facing you this Breakdown, with all the vivid memories I have of you stabbing me in the forehead with a fork?! Part of me is terrified. Cause you know what? You proved something too. Cause, yeah, Kimberly Williams won the match and the announce team went on about her brand of ‘chaos’, but you know who they were talking about when it came to violence? Mayhem? Blood and gore?

You, Wolf. You were the one they were talking about. Not Kim, not One, not Autumn, sure as hell not me. You. They were stunned at how violent and dangerous you were being. How dangerous and violent you are. For goodness sake with Odin watching, you used a damn fork as a weapon! You sought to maul and maim with a dull utensil. The title, I knew with you, was secondary to the damage, and it was all as you promised – you were the weapon of destruction… And the fact that I am facing that tonight certainly feels like a deathly chill running up and down my spine. Holy cats, that’s cold…

But don’t you see? Facing people like you has been my thing for weeks now. Kimberly and her chaos? Konrad Raab and his mace of ‘turnbuckle slicing’? Everyone at Apocalypse? None of them have been able to keep me down. Cause no matter how much it hurt every time I got slammed or kicked or hit with something or stabbed with something… the more it hurt… the more it scared me, the more that voice in my head kept screaming “Get up! Get up! Keep going! Keep fighting!”

You really don’t get it, do you, Wolf? I’ve never said I was the most dangerous or bloodthirsty or ruthless or any of that! I won’t lie like that. That’s not who I am. I’m not some violent crazed wrestler. I’m me. I like going for walks during the fall. I love my wife and kids. I love wrestling and how it pushes me.

That’s who I am, Sarah. 

And maybe I didn’t keep another SCW title but you know what? I found something maybe as important that night in Manhattan. I kept finding my grit. My drive. My refusal to back down and to keep going. And you? For all of your damage and all you can do and all of your strength and terror… you showed you have limits. That you, a beyond dangerous woman, still has that threshold that…if I can push you to it? You will not get back up, just like you couldn’t get back up at Apocalypse.

So, maybe this is crazy and maybe Selena will chew my ear off…in an unpleasant way… but Breakdown, yeah, I’m going to be coming for you ready to push you to that same threshold and beyond it. Maybe it won’t be Underground and will play more to my strengths of wrestling, sure, but if you think I haven’t learned anything from watching you and how many times you’ve thrown away your chances at victory in favor of doing more damage or ‘sending a message’…

But I don’t want to be your message of revenge or whatever, Sarah. I don’t want to be some other ‘victim’ in your rampage because you couldn’t get revenge on Kim or more pain on Autumn or whatever. I want to be more. I want to keep trying to understand my grit, to make myself better and to harness even more of it against people like you and Konrad. People that promise my destruction and yet… here I am. 

Because I survived, Wolf. I keep surviving. I keep taking everything you and SCW can throw at me and I keep surviving and I will KEEP surviving until I know how to thrive. And when I say ‘thrive’, I mean everywhere in this federation. To the point I, like my wife, I can enter whatever division I want or whatever division fate places me in, and just make it my own. Redefine it. Work it. Find my place within it but NEVER… NEVER again have a soul truly believe that I don’t belong here.

Breakdown is the start of all of that, Wolf. The start of not one place or one division needing to ‘define me’ but rather, all of SCW being my place, my place of ‘defining myself’. Every division: The Adrenaline, the United States, the World tag-team, the Underground, the Wo….

I will not settle to be pigeon-holed. I will rely on my grit – my heart – to keep me standing up to every challenge, every different opponent and opportunity. So if you want to come to me with the same promises you did at Apocalypse – if you’ve come to try and finish what you started with at least one of those combatants… go ahead.

Hurt me, Wolf. Come at me and try and drip that black stuff into my mouth or face. Try and force your fingers down my throat. Try and stab me with a fork again! And you can watch me keep getting back up, keep watching me stay alive in the match, no matter how much you punish or hurt me or make me scream!

Because no matter how much you make me scream, you can’t drown out that voice I hear in my mind. The voice of my wife and my voice and the True Believers and little Gritters – yeah, you heard me – the voice that tells me to keep going. Dangerous as you are, strong as you are, deadly as you are, Wolf, I don’t think you can silence them. 

And come Breakdown, you won’t be able to silence me or tell me I don’t belong. Tonight, I put all of SCW on notice. There is no place I can go, no place I won’t try to be part of. No place I won’t find joy in being part of! Whatever happens, wherever I go here, whomever I face, I will show I belong there and prove I deserve to be there and give the Gritters the best damn show I can! Tonight, I take you on, Wolf, at your angriest, most dangerous, and I will outlast you again! I will leave you unconscious one way or another. More than that… I’m going to continue to show my grit. Because I’ve come so far already…and I won’t back down now just because a monster stands before me now!

Checkmate, bitches!