Sapphire Taylor vs. Chase Upshaw

[Konrad Raab]

2 RP Limit for singles

3500 Word Limit Per RP

Deadline: 11:59:59 pm ET Thursday, August 29, 2024 (THIS DEADLINE REFLECTS A SUNDAY OR MONDAY RTG XXI POSTING)

[Braddock]

We open in an old school classroom; so old school that it has the traditional chalkboard as opposed to the whiteboards. Then we see the not so imposing figure of Chase Upshaw entering the classroom.

Chase Upshaw: Class, may I have your attention please. Class?

He narrows his brow in a grimace of pure hatred.

Class Upshaw: I SAID GIVE ME YOUR GOD DAMN UNDIVIDED ATTENTION YOU INBRED PIECE OF SHITS!

He breathes heavily for a few moments as he calms down.

Chase Upshaw: Good…now pay attention because there will be a quiz on this material later. Do any of you pathetic Gen Z losers have any fucking clue where Breakdown is being held this week? No? Well that’s fine because none of you probably have any idea what COUNTRY IT IS IN! You pathetic wastes of space make me sick! Let me ask you another question; do you idiotic droolers have a fucking clue where SCW is headquartered?

He pauses for a moment before pulling at his hair in frustration.

Chase Upshaw: GOD DAMN YOU ARE ALL DENSE! Canada! SCW is in Canada! You know, that nice place UP NORTH?! Yeah, NORTH! As in the GEOGRAPHICAL DIRECTION NORTH! AS IN THE OPPOSITE OF SOUTH! If you go south thinking you’re gonna find SCW then you’ll be wrong. You’ll walk across the border into Tijuana…AND I BET NONE OF YOU FUCKING IDIOTS CAN TELL ME WHERE THAT IS EITHER CAN YOU?!

He sighs and shakes his head.

Chase Upshaw: Tijuana is in Mexico. SCW is in Canada. Me? I am going to fight Sapphire Taylor. And I bet that she is another dimwit who doesn’t have the first fucking clue about basic geography. But she will learn…JUST LIKE THE REST OF YOU CLOWNS WILL LEARN…you and all of SCW will learn the hard way what happens when you fail one of Chase Upshaw’s geography quizzes!

…Class Dismissed…